Starting a FemDom marriage in the Vanilla Kingdom

Project Puppy

Today I had the pleasure of working on various projects for Mistress Trecia. She refers to me as her "project puppy" which I absolutely love.

To me, doing odd jobs for a Domme really submerses me in our D/s relationship and lets me enjoy my servitude in a completely non-sexual context.  It’s these moments more than anything that underscore for me how deep this need runs in myself.  I’ll be humming to myself, doing my little on-line tasks for Mistress, glowing with every "good puppy" comment she sends my way as I complete my assignments.

Yesterday, I helped Mistress set up a brand new forum for her site, a place where her "Parlor" members and boys can gather and chat amongst themselves and where she can take advantage of her guaranteed adult audience to say and so whatever she wants.  With the forum up and running, I spent today making some minor tweaks to get everything working and looking to Mistress’s standards.

I also spent time writing a few posts and tweaking my own profile so that everything will be ready when the other boys arrive.  I’m honored to have been tapped as a forum administrator, so I wanted to set a good example right off the bat.

In other news, my vanilla personal blog which I’ve been writing for about 5 years now (and that I’ve been neglecting to grow this site) finally bit the dust today.  My database corrupted itself so badly that the site is completely offline.  Like most people in the tech industry, I am notorious for not backing up my own stuff and am now suffering for it.  It looks like I’ll be able to salvage the original posts and pictures from the gallery, but any chance of a smooth transition from GeekLog to WordPress on a new site has been lost.  I think it’s time to just start over, anyway. 

Due to the loss, I’ve started working out a backup plan for my sites so I can automate a bi-weekly dump of everything.  I already manually backup Mistress’s sites twice per week, so a self-driven process would help me there as well.  In the meantime, I’m picking through the ashes and trying to recover everything I can.

In a way, the "clean slate" I have in my blog is a great metaphor for the changes that are taking place in my life after my fateful meeting with Mistress.  I feel like I’ve dropped a huge burden that I’ve been carrying.  Suppressing my submissive desires left me feeling so incomplete, a feeling that I tried to quench with everything from obsessive hobbies to drugs (both legal and illegal).  That emptiness and restlessness have vanished now, replaced with a joy and contentment that I just can’t describe.

Part of me wishes that I had figured this out a long time ago when I was younger and in a better position to drastically change my life to embrace my reawakened calling.  I know, however, that at any other time, I wouldn’t have meet Mistress Trecia and don’t know if my unhappiness would have reached enough critical mass to force me to examine this unlikely root cause of my personal grief.

I was asked once not too long ago if I regretted anything in my life.  The answer I gave was that who I am is the result of what has come before, both the positive and the painful, and any changes would unravel everything.  I have to carry that over now and acknowledge that my meeting with Mistress arrived at the perfect time in my life - any sooner and I may not have had the profound revelation that I had, any later may have caused me to dismiss change as being impractical or impossible.

It’s enough to turn a cynical fatalist into a grinning idiot.

See, I’m smiling again…

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