Starting a FemDom marriage in the Vanilla Kingdom

Archive for June, 2007

Bad Case of Real Life

Sorry for the week-long gap in posting. I got bogged down in a couple of huge work projects that even kept us from The Club this past weekend, so there actually wasn’t much to post in any case!  (I even turned down an offered assignment last night because I’ve been so exhausted and overwhelmed.  Thankfully, things are starting to get back to normal.)

Planning for the big Colorado trip is almost done and MJ assures me it is going to be awesome! (Outside of fetching some information or copying pages out of her books at her request, she has handled all the arrangements. So, other than knowing we needed unlimited miles on our rental car, I have no idea what we are going to be doing.  The secrecy has been a lot of fun and I know MJ is doing it partly just because she can.  Of course, I love it!)

The last part of the trip is our visit to Thunder in the Mountains, the awesome BDSM conference in Denver.  MJ warned me a couple of days ago that since some of the kinkiest and most skilled folks from around the country are going to be there, She may not way to play in the public dungeon.  She did say that she would more likely be wanting to take notes!  We are packing a trunk full of toys to bring with, so I know we will have a lot of fun even if it is in the privacy of our hotel room.

I got word from The Club (as the BDSM club MJ and I joined will now be known) that I am allowed to blog about personal experiences between MJ and I, but talking about anything else is still strictly forbidden.  MJ has told me to be prepared to go on Saturday, so I’m sure I’ll have plenty to tell!

That’s all for now - I’ll have more to report after the weekend!

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Sugasm #85

Sugasm #85

The best of this weeks blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #86? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form.

This Week’s Picks
A Little Fun at Home (…)
“She surprised herself when her fingers found the actual ice cube melting inside her cunt.”

The Anniversary Present (…)
“But I knew that nothing would be more appropriate to the new path we’ve chosen than a threesome with another man on the night celebrating our wedding so many years ago.”

Girl’s Night In (…)
“Some of us are more conservative than one would have thought, and some of us, it appears from dropped jaws round the table, are less.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
7 Simple Ways to Future-proof Your Blog (…)

Editor’s Choice
My Exam (…)

Join the Sugasm


See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday (

Erotic Writing and Experiences
The Dragonfly (…)
Greedy Eyes (…)
I awoke… (…)
I remember entering the hotel room (… )
It should have been a dream then! (…)
Music & Cock (…)
Party Games Part 2 (…)
Petals….. (…)
The Pirate Captain (…)
Razor Stubble (…)
So good I could almost come (…)
Through the Crack (…)
Yesterday (…)

Sex & Politics
Gay Marriage Survives (…)

NSFW Pics, Videos & Audio
Beautiful Agony Video (…)
Betcee May - Nude in Nature (…)
Filthy Food (…)
Sasha Cohen (…)
Wild - Pictorial Presentation (…)

Sex Work
Charlie and the Chocolate Covered Cock (…)
When A Client Dies-Part 1 (…)

BDSM & Fetish
The Back Room (…)
The Control of a Submissive (…)
Happy HNT - Summertime spanking (…)
His kiss (…)
How Was Your Weekend? (…)
I want to hurt you (…)
Painslut (…)
“The Real Reason I Have Long Hair,” smut from the archives (…)
Scenes From My Bedroom - Part 4: Giving up control (…)
Two vingnettes from two scenes (…)
Yanking My Chain (…)

Sex News & Reviews
Coming back with v.2.0 (…)
Featured Fetish Film - Toys For Twats (Nun Fetish, Old, Sacrilege, Yikes) (…)
Fern wood tonight (…)
Half-Nekkid and Playing the Field (…)
How To Make 3 Girls Have An Orgasm (…)
Introducing the Nude Photography of Eva’s Garden (…)
MSNBC and Green Sex Toys (…)
Welcome to Teeny Phone Sex! (…)

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
Daddy Day (…)
Lacking Sexuality (…)
Love and Crush: Confessions (…)
Lunch (…)
More keyword analysis (…)
Slutdom Redefined (…)
Without your input (…)

Picture of Catalina courtesy of Catalina Loves Her Collar.

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TMI Tuesday #89

Happy (very belated) TMI Tuesday!

1. Does the carpet match the drapes?

Well, my head has hair and the junk don’t, so no. (I actually love the feeling of being bare "down there" and consider that a perk of being a kept sub.)

2. Have you ever used personal information about someone to blackmail them?

I indirectly helped my boss get his budget approved. One of the higher-ups was shopping for escorts from his office PC. Oops!

3. What is your favorite thing to lick?

Nipples. I love the way they get hard as you tease them.

4. Have you ever had sex in a place of worship? (i.e., church, temple, mosque, etc.)

No. I once did a piano performance in a church only to have it burn down the next day. Coincidence or a critique from God? Hmm…

5. If you watch video porn, do you buy it in a store, from a catalog, online, or download it? LINK!!! ;)

I used to buy a lot of magazines and tapes (then DVDs), but now just download. My favorite site at the moment is PureTnA.

Bonus (as in optional): How often, if ever, do you "fake it?"

There’s been two times in my life where I’ve faked it. The first was when I was hopped up on Zoloft which made it tough to cum. The other time was when I was saving up for my Domme at the time when having sex with my Wife. (I know, I know. Fortunately, my Wife and Domme are one and the same now, so it only happens on her command now…)

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Oh, Sweet Release! (Kinda)

MJ gave me a fantastic assignment last night, another of those that looks great on the surface but gives me a realization at how deliciously evil she can be.

When MJ was headed up to bed around 11:30 last night, She told me I could have a stroking assignment.  Better yet, I’d be allowed to cum!  YES!

I was to stroke until I came.  Then, I had to end the session on an edge.  There was no time limit and I could watch whatever porn I desired.  Sounds like a fantastic deal, right?

I settled into MJ’s den with her permission.  Her computer has a way nicer monitor that my little laptop and she also have a nice, high-backed leather chair that is really comfy.  I tapped into my newly downloaded porn stash and started to browse.

I stumbled across some videos from and they were everything I had hoped they would be.  The site’s video formula is pretty simple:  tie a guy up and have an attractive women (or two) tease him until he cums.  In other words, HHHHHHHHhhhot

Despite the amazing new video samplings I managed to keep my wits about me for a change and made the build up to orgasm last almost 45 minutes until I finally couldn’t hold out any longer and I let myself cum, my cock throbbing in my hand with each spurt.

Then, of course, the next part of the assignment hit me and I realized that I’d have to keep stroking.  And not just keep stroking, but do so until I hit the edge.

The next 30 minutes was incredibly difficult, the uber-sensitive head of my cock in agony as I kept stroking.  I finally found the pleasure inside the pain and turned the sensations to my advantage, my desire (and cock) growing again until I hit the edge.  Since I was working at full steam trying to get to the edge, I hit it much harder than I anticipated and it took everything I had to hold the second orgasm inside. 

Afterwards, I was left hornier than ever despite my release and aching from the intense sensations of the assignment.

In other words, that…was…AWESOME!

MJ giggled this morning when I related how I rushed into the assignment without considering the last bit of it.  It was exactly as She had planned and left the desired result.  It’s fun to see Her using Her deep knowledge of me to my disadvantage and also great to see the thought and care that She’s been putting into assignments and sessions. 

She really is a natural at this…

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TMI Tuesday #88

Another week, another TMI Tuesday!

1. If you were to face the Wizard of Oz, would you want more courage, more brains, or more heart?

More brains. You can never have too many of those.

2. Have you ever gone to court for anything? What for?

Mainly just for speeding tickets. I did have to testify against my Scoutmaster in a molestation case. Boy, was that fun. Despite him being completely guilty of multiple counts and the ensuing witch hunt destroying all of my friendships at the time, the verdict was reversed on appeal. I wasn’t technically a "victim" because I was 16 and consented. (The law was different in Illinois back then.) The DA put me on the stand anyway to prove a pattern, but the court thought it was too prejudicial.

The process of being chewed up by the legal process that was supposed to protect me fucked me up way more than the act itself. (The best was being forced to call the police from my counselor’s office and then having two detectives show up at my work and take me away for questioning without my parents being present.)

3. What was the last thing you did that you previously told yourself you wouldn’t do?

Fall too hard for a Domme.

4 Did you ever have a summer fling while on vacation?

No, but it looks like a cool thing to do if all those 80’s movies can be believed. Of course, you’d also have to take on the local rich guy to save the local hangout teaching everyone a valuable lesson about acceptance, so it’s probably way more trouble than it’s worth.

5. Have you ever done anything sexual with someone who’s name you never knew?

First name, no. Last name, yes.

Bonus (as in optional): What is the best way to mend a broken heart?

Time. And revenge…


Sugasm #84

Sugasm #84

The best of this weeks blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #85? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form.

This Week’s Picks
C’s Little Witch (…)
“Tom wrote on his blog I would do anything carnal to please her: oh, yes. Oh, yes.”

How to have a secret affair at work (…)
-Funny video-

Desperate wantonness is not always pretty (…)
“Am I now so desperate for sex that I’m causing random sex toys to spontaneously get off when they’re around me?”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
ActionGirls 2007 (…)

Editor’s Choice
History of Gay and Lesbian Pride Month (…)


See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday (

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
All Righty Then… (…)
Attention to detail (…)
Hot and Bothered:Feminist Pornography (…)
In Which I Defend Myself, And Likely You Too (…)
On Baritones and the State of My Panties (…)
A Random Post About Why Shay Rarely Reads Erotica (…)
Thank You, Sir, May I Have Another? (…)

BDSM & Fetish
Dress Up (…)
His need (…)
Kink In The Mainstream - Exhibit B: Family Guy Bondage (…)
Making sense of it all (…)
Marked (…)
My choice (my choice)
Wicked Saturday - Part 1 (…)
You gotta be punished! (…)

NSFW Pics, Videos & Audio
Half-Nekkid Nipples (…)
Party Tricks (…)
Two For One (…)

Sex Work
Chastity (…)

Sex News & Reviews
Celebrate Pride Month with Our GLBT Designs! (…)
Ohio: no nudes is good nudes… (…)
Pearl Pleasure Comfort Grip Stroker Review (…)
Punished Brats review (…)

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Appel téléphonique (…)
Dress Code (…)
First date etiquette revised (…)
Frustration (…)
A lovely evening (…)
My Body is Yours (…)
A Night with the Office Meeting Guy (part 2) (…)
Orgasm Addict (…)
Party Games - Part 1 (…)
Tonight You Belong To Me (…)
Unexpected, Part Four (…)
What Comes After “Hello” (…)

Sex Humor
Eating Pussy (…)
Lawnmower Sex (…)
Paris Hilton Forced, By Society, To Acknowledge Worthlessness (…)

Nipple clamps courtesy of Sweat Shop Sissy.

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How Was Your Weekend?

Every Monday, I get the same question at work:  "How was your weekend?"

These days, it’s hard to hide my smile when I say "Oh, you know, the usual".

This past Saturday, we spent the night at Galleria Domain again, this time as actual members.  I’ve asked Mistress Carol for permission to blog about our sessions, but until I get permission, I’m still bound by the NDA. 

Here, however, are some highlights:

  • MJ (unbeknownst to me) has been practicing Her flogging technique.  It was really obvious once we were in scene, however.  I am nearly a foot taller than MJ and for this session I was up on a Saint Andrew’s Cross that has a little platform on which to stand which added at least another 3 - 4 inches.  Despite the height difference, MJ still managed to deliver blows with amazing power and incredible aim.
  • I spend over two hours on the cross getting beaten on my back and ass.  It only seemed like 20 minutes went by.
  • I still have marks two days later (including matching round bruises on my ass cheeks from MJ’s paddle).
  • MJ made me cry.  Twice. 
  • There were two times I tried to climb up the cross to escape the dreaded paddle.  MJ’s comment was "That’s the first time you’ve ever needed the restraints for anything more than decoration.  Cool!"
  • We had a wonderful aftercare session with me curled up next to MJ with my head on Her chest, Her stroking my hair in the way I love so much.  It was a really tender moment and I felt to close to Her at that moment.  It’s this type of intimacy that I’ve been longing for in our marriage, but I never imagined that we’d get there on this route.  (Afterward, MJ had me provide some Domme aftercare by having me massage Her neck and shoulders with Her vibrating glove.)

Hopefully, I’ll be able to post details in the very near future.  Well, at least those that I remember.  I was high as a kite in subspace, so much of the session is a blur of erotic pain and white light.

We left the club at about 2:30 in the morning and headed home.  Once we arrived, we headed upstairs, got undressed, and I started to set up the bed for the night (my usual ritual of fluffing the pillows and so on).  MJ told me to stop and lie down next to Her and, once I did, grabbed my hand and pulled it down between Her legs.  Our mouths met in a hot, wet kiss as I explored her sacred spot, MJ moaning her arousal through the kiss.

I brought MJ to orgasm and she immediately ordered me up on my knees.  "Stroke for me, boy."  Yes, Mistress.  I grabbed my cock and started to stroke, MJ taking over with Her hand watching me stroke with abandon.  Once I was moaning with my own pleasure, I was ordered to use my cock to please my Mistress.

Our limbs intertwined on the bed and hot sticky skin pulled together as I slid inside MJ, her grabbing a fistful of my hair a reward for my performance.  "Slow down, NOW!  I get to go first," was MJ’s command, her lips brushing my ear as she gave Her instructions sending shivers up my spine.

As usual, I was on the edge immediately trying to maintain my thrusting while saving my own ultimate pleasure until MJ was fully satisfied.  When I could no longer hold out, I started to beg for permission to cum.  Please.  Please, Mistress.  Please.

With a cry of pleasure, MJ yelled, "YES!  NOW!" and I came with a yell as my pent up arousal was released in a single powerful burst, my body filled with waves of pleasure, both from my own release and from the satisfaction of being able to please my Mistress.  I collapsed on top of MJ and she grabbed my hair again.

"You made quite a mess, boy!  You need to clean it up, NOW!"  She accented the last word by pushing my head down, leaving no mystery about what She expected of me.  I buried my face between MJ’s legs and started pleasuring Her with the techniques she taught me, my face quickly covered in my own cum along with MJ’s fragrant juices.  My tender licking was greeted with more cries of pleasure quickly reaching a crescendo as MJ came for a third time.

MJ told me I had fulfilled my duties for the night and was free to clean up and go to sleep.  I washed my face and climbed into bed, overcome by the post-coital coma and endorphin crash.  I fell instantly into a deep, fitful sleep.

During the ride home, MJ and I discussed the fact that we’ve managed to come from our horrible fight and the brink of divorce to where we are now in just over 7 weeks.  Part of me wishes I could go back a few years and whisper to my younger, unhappy self to tell him that everything will be okay and that ecstasy and passion beyond his wildest dreams is not only possible but imminent. 

"No, seriously dude!  You’re going to get a membership to a private BDSM club and your wife will become an amazing Domme!"  I wonder if I’d believe it…

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New Assignment / Going Crazy

Since MJ lifted the porn ban, I’ve been on PureTnA constantly and have downloaded about 12 gigs worth in the last week alone.  Granted, some of it was for MJ (She enjoys babysitter themed stories, so I found a huge video archive full of them just for Her), but most was me trying (unsuccessfully) to satiate my growing need.

Whenever I start to get that longing for an orgasm, I immediately start to go overboard to try and compensate.  When I am allowed to touch, I stroke until I’m raw, edging again and again but just making myself more miserable.  Now, I can’t even do that so I’m just winding myself up with an all-you-can-view porn buffet that is just making my desire stronger along with my suffering.

I was contemplating asking MJ for permission to stroke and/or cum tonight (something she despises and usually denies anyway), when I got the following e-mail:

Did you think I forgot you?  Your assignment tonight is 30 min of edge play to submissive female with a male dom or any porn where you watch the male orgasm over and over. I want you to watch men do what you are not allowed to do. Yes, you are not allowed to come!

Mistress Jacqueline

Is it just me, or did it suddenly get warmer in here?   MJ, of course, knows my greatest weaknesses and is an expert at exploiting them.  As much as I want to stroke, I know that this specific assignment will wind me up twice as fast as watching other men cum when I’m being denied just drives me crazy.  (In the past, I’ve found myself at XTube watching cum shot after cum shot until my cock is leaking like a faucet and I’m practically whimpering with acute denial.)

And, as always, I love every minute of it!  (In fact, I need to wait for a little bit before refilling my coffee here at work since the tent pole in my khakis will give away my incredible state of arousal just at the mere thought of tonight’s assignment.) 

I do so love being MJ’s plaything…

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Wicked Saturday - Part 2

This post was going to be a detailed account of our first play session at Galleria Domain, but MJ reminded me of the lengthy non-disclosure agreement (which we both just reviewed again).  Because we agreed not to discuss the goings on within the club, I’m just going to give some general statements about our wonderful night there.

First, we really love the atmosphere and people at GD.  They are just fantastic and so friendly, especially to two nervous newcomers.  Mistress Carol, the "headmistress"-slash-manager of the club spent a great deal of time talking with us our first night and we just adore her, so our decision not to "whip and tell" is almost solely out of respect for her.

The flogging class was fantastic.  Scott Smith was extremely charismatic and funny and really connected with the audience.  During the "hands on" portion of the class, MJ got some one-on-one time with him and Her flogging skill markedly improved in just that one class.  (She’s since been practicing since, so I’m sure our next session will be especially interesting.)

Since we’re members now, we got to stay after the class once all the guests were shooed away and GD officially opened.  We joined the handful of members that stuck around in the "Fireside Lounge" to chat and meet some new people.  As previously mentioned, we were treated to a chat with Mistress Carol which was a lot of fun.  We also got a chance to watch a few other couples play which was really interesting and exciting.

After a couple of hours (and a quick run out for some dinner), MJ told me to get her toy bag and to meet her in one of the play rooms.  The session was wonderful and showed how far MJ has come in a very short time.  I spent the session cuffed and chained to a spanking bench with MJ using her new (and incredibly stingy!) new flogger on my back and ass.  Her confidence was so incredible and she showed no signs of nervousness at playing in such a public setting for the first time.  (By that time of night, the club was jumping, so there were plenty of folks watching.)  She confessed later that she was nervous, but really got into the session after it started and said that the laid-back and accepting atmosphere of the club and members really helped.

It was my first public play session and I was thrilled.  The thought of being put on display really brought out my inner exhibitionist and (combined with the pain) was a one-way ticket to the deep, gooey center of subspace.  I’m looking forward to future sessions there (we’re already planning another trip this weekend) and will discuss the blog with Mistress Carol to see if she has any issues with me writing about our own adventures.  (I’m assuming the "no tell" rule is mainly to protect other members, but we don’t want to go abuse the policy in any way without permission.)

Finally, the completely surreal day came to a close with a midnight visit to the Buffy the Vampire Slayer musical sing-along at the Music Box Theater.   One of the people in line with us waiting to get in referred to it as a "less slutty Rocky Horror Picture Show".  Everybody got a small bag of things like confetti poppers and a kazoo along with a reference card telling you when to do what (like yelling "Shut up, Dawn!" whenever Buffy’s sister chimed in with unhelpful advice).  MJ and I are both huge Buffy fans, so we were completely geeking out in a very good way.  The show was an absolute blast and everyone there was just having too much fun.

We finally got home at about 3 a.m. and crashed hard, sleeping until almost noon on Sunday.  All in all, it was a wonderful first night out into the local BDSM club scene and we both were just aglow with happiness and revelling in our renewed connection. 

On Sunday, we compared notes about the night and also had to remind ourselves that we’ve only been a D/s couple for 7 weeks now.   It boggles the mind that we are where we are after such a short amount of time, but to me it just shows that we connected subconsciously on this level when we first met long ago and it just took this long for us to admit our deepest desires to ourselves.  It’s the only way I can explain why this is the most "right" our relationship has felt since we first got married and the absolutely blissful state I’m in every single day now.

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TMI Tuesday #87

Another week, another TMI Tuesday!

1. What is the meanest thing you’ve ever done/said to a lover/loved one?

I’ve had a few periods in my life where I was a serious asshole, so I have a few to choose from. Probably the worst was with MJ when we decided to try swinging and She decided not to go through with, so I took Her home and returned to the party. Yeah - I know. The full story is here.

2. Have you ever had sex on an elevator?

Never sex, but I have petted and made out on one.

3. Have you ever lied about a rash and said it was a birthmark? OR Have you ever lied about a birthmark and said it was a rash?

I have a scar I lied about. I used to tell girls that I got it in a knife fight. (I actually got it as a kid working on a craft project when my box cutter slipped. Ow.)

4. Have you ever had sex on a beach or in the water at a beach/pool?

A few times in a hot tub. I’ve been naked with others in a pool, but no sex.

5. How old are you? How old do you feel? =P

37, but feel more like 28ish. My hair and beard have just started to gray a little, so I’m getting a dose of reality in this department.

6. Have you or your partner been injured so badly during sex that you/they had to go to the hospital?

Not yet, but we’re trying. :)

7. Have you been to a strip club or "titty bar"? (Hooters does NOT count.) If so, did you get a lap dance?

Yes and yes. I haven’t been in a long time because I don’t see the point. (I’d rather spend the money on good porn or memberships to places like Galleria Domain where you can actually see/get some action. The "sit on your hands and watch me" thing just isn’t worth the cash. Now back in California, they had adult book stores with "nudie booths" which were much more interesting. Because of the glass, the girls could go as far as they wanted and that type of voyeur action (usually two-way since you got to participate "single-handedly") was much more my speed. Still not cheap, but lots of fun.

Bonus (as in optional): Have you ever had a "blog crush" (i.e., a crush on someone, of whatever gender, that you haven’t met in person but only know through their blog)? Who? (Link, please, if you dare!) =P

I don’t know if it’s a crush (more like a BILF [Blogger I’d Like to Fuck]), but I really admire Curvaceous Dee. She’s articulate, intelligent, kinky, and a sexy BBW. How could any one resist that combination? (In fact, I love MJ for the same reasons.)


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