Starting a FemDom marriage in the Vanilla Kingdom

Archive for August, 2007

Another Update

I’m back from my gaming convention and feeling a little restless.  MJ and I have passed the critical 12-week mark in Her pregnancy meaning that we’re nearly out of the woods for any issues.  This is the farthest we’ve ever made it and the thought of finally being parents is exciting for both of us.

Unfortunately, MJ is having a hard time with the pregnancy in general including nausea and exhaustion, so our D/s life has almost completely vanished.  I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed, but I completely understand not feeling sexy.  Still - being so close to subbie bliss and now going back to a regular marriage for the time being has been frustrating.

I know that makes me sound completely selfish and I am in some ways.  I would never, however,  trade this baby for anything and the success MJ and I had in our marriage because of D/s is helping us through these times.  Like I said - I understand the situation and (short of me feeling a little sorry for myself on the D/s front) things are actually going really well.

Plus, I figure I waited 37 years to finally be true to myself.  Another few months is just a drop in the bucket.  I plan to use the time to continue getting into shape so that once we to head back to The Club, MJ can fully show me off on that lace-down table we’ve both been fantasizing about.

In the meantime, I’m planning to talk to MJ about perhaps letting me work on my milking machine so I can at least submerse myself somewhat into D/s with the added bonus of having a new toy once we’re back to playing again.

For the blog, I am still working on a couple of articles and am also trying to find things to write about in this vacuum of ongoing personal experience.

More to follow soon - I just wanted to drop a quick update so you didn’t think I had abandoned the blog!



Hello! Sorry for the silence this past week, but I’ve been wrestling with the post I’ve been writing.

During a workshop at Thunder, Gloria Brame described pro Dommes as "a plague on our community".  Based on that, I’ve been doing some soul searching and reexamining my previous stance   As with all things, however, I’ve gotten myself sucked into a gray area and have been trying to figure out exactly where I stand.  Thus far, I’ve rewritten big pieces of the article three times without it coming out exactly how I want it to.

Since this is such a hot-button issue, I decided to take my time and will only publish it once it accurately states my feelings.  I’d hate to start a flame war when I’m not completely sure of my own views.

In other news, the baby is coming along nicely.  MJ is almost 12 weeks along now and every test shows things are going just about perfectly.  I’m still holding my breath and haven’t told anyone I know the news yet for fear that my heart will be broken again.  This is the best things have gone thus far and the doctor has said we’re pretty much home free (the fertility doc is just about to release my wife back to her OB/GYN as there is nothing else he can do), but there is still that nagging fear that says I shouldn’t get my hopes up just yet.

Our D/s life has been somewhat on hold with all that has been going on.  MJ and I had a talk about small things that would help me through the "dry spell", mainly getting small tasks around the house and a head pat now and again. 
MJ did give me one treat - we went out to Chipotle the other night for dinner and after fetching food, drinks, and silverware my waiting Goddess, She told me to sit down and bow my head, after which she reached across the table, patted my head, and said "good boy".  The praise and such a D/s gesture in a public place were enough to have me glowing for the rest of the night.

Next week, I’ll be out of town at a gaming convention (one of my annual traditions that MJ thankfully is letting me keep) and after that I hope MJ and I can get back into the club scene or at least have some playtime at home. 

I have been missing the unique sensation that only comes from submitting to Her wonderful tortures…